Heart Opening Moments

BLOG of a Spiritual Stripper

You Want Intimacy?

What if we truly became intimate with love and life from moment to moment? What if we can break out from our old patterns and live in the present moment?

How many people out there want true love, intimacy, or be in a state of complete oneness? What’s standing in the way to our most innate desires?

Recently I’ve noticed something very interesting about human interactions. Most people are not capable of deep intimacy because they are not living in the present moment.

Not long ago a friend asked me how I am doing. I gladly told him the confusion I was experiencing after awakening snuck up on me a few months ago and stole all that I called “myself”. I felt like a computer crash when all the files I depended on disappeared over night. I was left with nothing. I became a big nothing. Nowadays sailing on an uncharted territory I feel like an airhead with no thoughts to grab onto or memories to rely on. Enjoying an unfiltered sense of humor, I giggled when I told him that all I can do is navigate my way around from moment to moment and I “warned” him that I might just blank out on him.

“Oh, don’t feel sorry for yourself!” He told me sharply without losing a beat.

Hmmm… What? It took me a few seconds to understand his reply. Then it took me even longer to realize that he wasn’t talking to me – he was talking to himself. From his perspective I sounded like I was a victim because from where he stands that is probably what he would’ve felt. He did not sense my joy and wonder, instead, he projected his own pain into my picture. He thought he was having a conversation with me but he really was responding to a part within himself. Then he went on to give me a lecture about how lonely I must feel and that I must seek out help. Hmmm… Interesting. And Frustrating. He wasn’t sharing the same point in space/time with me, instead, he was responding to his old programming. Needless to say, our conversation ended quickly. Later he told me how intimate and connected he always feels when we talk and he assured me that he completely understands where I am.

O.K. No comment.

Unfortunately this is how most humans interact. No wonder close friendships and romantic relationships are so difficult. Most of us have a record player in our head that plays old thoughts and conversations over and over again. Even when we interact with a new person or a new situation we are still plugged into the past. Behaviors are pre-determined by our past programming and we literally live in an endless loop like the movie Groundhog’s Day. We respond by selecting from memory a list of old patterns we possess. There is no room for anything new. Even when life brings something new for us to experience, our view can only be polluted by the same old thoughts, behaviors, and patterns.

Have you noticed that people who are more spiritually awaken have greater capacity for intimacy? They are available to love, to share, and to just be. They are not tied down into a story they tell themselves about what reality is. They live in reality. They live in the now. The only way to experience true intimacy is to live in the present moment anew – gazing with wondrous innocent eyes. In a way we must be willing to ditch the old record player and let the thoughts float away like balloons into the sky. When we are not identified with our thoughts our emotional body tends to free up equally. When our emotional body opens up then we are no longer unnecessarily contracting our energy or protecting ourselves. Only by not pulling back into our shells are we able to participate in a real and honest relationship. Would you rather talk to someone who truly listens to you at the deepest level or someone interprets your words with their own definition? Would you rather make love to someone tense and bottled-up or someone sensual and free?

In a way our spiritual path must be that of our own. We all walk alone in our own journey on the path towards matured enlightenment. When we awake we discover that there is only the One, and the One is perfectly eternally alone. Yet the One is never lonely. Being lonely is impossible when the whole entire universe is your lover – tenderly, intimately, in bliss.

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September 6, 2012 - Posted by | Death & Rebirth, Emotional Freedom, love, Self Realization, World Transformation | , , , , , , , , , , ,

9 Comments »

  1. If I might interject…

    To this individual, you referred to yourself with phrases like “feel like nothing”, loss of “self”, “crashed hard drive”, “sailing in uncharted territory”, and, the clincher, “airhead.” The rest are metaphors that can be either good or bad, but “airhead” is not usually used in a positive fashion. Indeed, is is almost always used in a pejorative fashion, a disrespectful fashion, toward a person regarded as having frustratingly low intelligence.

    And you were surprised this individual asked you not to be so hard on yourself?

    I believe I understand where you were coming from. I had a similar experience. A rather traumatic experience I went through a bit over half a decade ago (we discussed it for a bit during my visit) quite literally destroyed me… to my own profit. I know what it is to cast aside the mutilated superstructure of self and watch in wonder as a divine hand erects something new.

    But I have a feeling that, with your friend, “what we’ve got here is… failure to communicate.” You attempted to convey one idea; he received another, and from your own words, I can’t help but be surprised at your own surprise.

    Do you operate under the assumption that your words are as good as they can get? Do you assume that, when another fails to understand your words, the problem is always with the other’s capacity to understand, and not your own capacity to express?

    On the very same note, I hope I’ve written clearly. I have noticed, in the past, that my writing style doesn’t always get my meaning across. “Agriculture bugs”, indeed. <.<

    Comment by Daryl Sawyer | September 6, 2012 | Reply

  2. Huh. That second-to-last paragraph is harsher than I intended.

    Comment by Daryl Sawyer | September 6, 2012 | Reply

  3. I was thinking about self first and external second and then the same difference. I see Flo as being working circumstances with the aspects of self. Not to be criticized, but to be observed. Actually this is what she’s doing. Everything isn’t together at the same all of the time , of course not. To critical a comment, she tries to hard. Who knows this, though I almost said it. Objectivity being allowing for, 7 1/2 billion definitions, originally, individually meaning one.. What about mastery as a way of life. What mastery?

    Comment by Frank Seidl | September 6, 2012 | Reply

    • Frank I find you have a rare ability to understand energy without getting too stuck into the words. I am always amazed by your intuition and your precision of sense.

      Comment by Flo Li | September 6, 2012 | Reply

  4. Flo has a reputation, nickname that I ran into. This is a growing thing, “A Wise One” I won’t snitch and expose the source. I like Warrior Princess She has what she wants.

    Comment by Frank Seidl | September 6, 2012 | Reply

  5. I spent years listening to people talk about themselves as me. They simply couldn’t get beyond the fact and really didn’t realize that’s what they were doing.

    If you not good enough to live your own life for yourself, would you please, please get somebody that knows what their doing to do it for you. Possibly your friends have observed enough about you. Take an interest in it
    But, lay off of me, I have my own personality. I conduct myself in my own way. I don’t believe some of the things I am doing or how I exist because of your opinion.

    What about objectivity though. But then you have to know what your doing. I can use most things as mine and not have a problem with myself. This is true.

    Comment by Frank Seidl | September 6, 2012 | Reply

  6. I wrote this to quickly
    Objectivity, definition, allowing for. 7 1/2 billion definitions and originality, individually meaning one.. What about mastery as a way of life. What mastery? Ironically you do find universal and in common existence even though. You have to allow for the existence of it for it to exist. You have to recognize yourself as such. (Everything and nothing)

    Comment by Frank Seidl | September 7, 2012 | Reply

  7. Beautiful, I am ecstatic for the field of oneness you are experiencing and feel truly blessed for the moments of intimacy we have shared in our friendship. I am so grateful to be in Love with my own process right now and seems I am overflowing with joyousness and stillness in my inner space too. I Love you, me, and all I see happening here with awakening ones. HI is fantastic so far, and I will be visiting CA in Nov. See you then and thanks for opening for I see you even more clearly now.
    Aloha ~ April

    Comment by April Lloyd | September 7, 2012 | Reply

  8. years ago when one of my family went thru the awakend process, none of us knew what it was, we got together and came to conclusion that she “has lost it”, because she does not conform to what we believe. We suggested that she should seek help from hospital. It turned out that our limited life experience doses not appreciate what is not in our past experience. Actually, she has broken the physical boundry and in touch with the other dimension

    A month ago when I saw Flo, she has shown a lot of the qualities of being awakened, something that many of us spiritual seekers have been looking for. This time, with so much joy, I recognized it right away, I am so happy for you Flo, you have done it in this life time, with a lot of courage of course. Thank you for helping me remove some major blockages last week, or it may easily take a long long time to do so.

    I cherish and love you as my own child, yet I bow down to you as my master

    Comment by tai | September 7, 2012 | Reply


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