Heart Opening Moments

BLOG of a Spiritual Stripper

Being Naked

innocence of a child

What was your true face before you were born? How far can you strip away the layers of personas, protections and beliefs? And what will you find at the core of who you are?

When was the last time you felt naked? Totally unprotected and exposed? I don’t suppose it was very pleasant for most of us. However “being naked” is exactly the doorway leading to the most profound spiritual transformations.

So much of our lives we dress ourselves up in a persona. “I’m the thriller-seeking skydiver triathlete doctor.” or “I’m the successful microbiologist who published twice in Science magazine.” or even “I’m the  geeky shy guy who is awkward at parties.” These are the beliefs of who we are – that is who we are to the external world. We often live our lives according to a defined persona by choosing what to say, eat or act. Other people see us as this persona and they tend to categorize us into various boxes to know our likes and dislikes. There’s an invisible line that we never speak of or cross. We are careful maintaining a safe distance with each other. As long as we see each other as their persona they we can all be safe.

Sometime ago a friend learned that I practice Isha yoga and meditate everyday for at least two hours, I visit temples and ashrams,  and I’m an animal lover. So he assumed that I am either a vegan or a vegetarian and do not drink a drop of alcohol. When I told him that I was craving steak tartare with a healthy glass of red wine he looked at me with shocking eyes and a hint of disgust. Just to pierce through his illusions further I told him that I was once addicted to video games and didn’t sleep for three nights and I love playing jokes on people I love. I think he had a heart attack weeks after our conversation.

Psychologically we feel a need to protect ourselves from the opinions and judgment of others around us in order to feel safe and accepted. We think we must maintain a self-image at all times. Earlier in our childhood we need the physical protection of our care-takers in order to survive. If we behave the way they approve then we get food, shelter, and love. Bit by bit we learn that it is not okay to be who we are but we must present the correct self-image to the world in order to survive. We must be a certain way to obtain love. It is well documented from the works of Sigmund Freud that we struggle with life instincts he called the libido or sexual desires. In my view the expression of sexual desires is a life desire for love and intimacy. We instinctually desire to love and be loved. Yet our personas and layers of protection meant to keep us feeling safe become exactly the barriers that keep love at bay. Then instead of uncovering our unconscious tendencies that push people away we blame others for their “inadequacies”. Anna Freud popularized the ego defense mechanisms through her research and identified various unconscious psychological strategies we use to shield ourselves from perceived danger. It is said that we all carry a self-image like a shield over our chest. And an ego defense mechanism only becomes pathological is when its use leads to behaviors adversely affect the physical or mental health of an individual. From what I’ve seen, most people are in denial about how their ego defense mechanism is taking control of their lives. If you watch yourself closely and be very honest, you will begin to notice how you make your everyday choices is controlled by a perceived danger from your external environment. In short, our shield’s function was meant to keep our mind feeling safe but the side effect is pushing love away.

I know a lot of people but only a few individuals can truly open themselves up to True Love and intimacy. Sexuality is easy, True Love is intimidating. It requires one to be completely naked. Only through our nakedness can we truly experience who we really are. Only through our nakedness can we truly connect with another on the most fundamental level. And only through our nakedness can we know life as it really is. Lately I’m getting tired of being superficial in some of my friendships. I’m a person who needs depth and substance. I want to see you, I want to feel the depth of your being, and I want to dance with the mystery within the core of who you are. My desire is to be naked and see you naked. It doesn’t matter to me if I don’t fit into your box of proper personas. What’s important to me is to be true – to you and to me. I am not here to indulge your neediness or to help to inflate your ego. I am here to wake you up – to your own nakedness – to your own mystery – and the ultimate adventure of being completely intimate with Love and all that is.

June 7, 2012 Posted by | Death & Rebirth, Inner Growth, Self Realization | , , , , , , , , , , | 14 Comments